I have a list of 1000 deep things I want to talk about. Thoughts that flow through my head in full – when my mind is writing but my hands are doing something else. But the fact of the matter is – I am exhausted. I spent HOURS drawing each card – making versions to upload everywhere (the extra amount to censor your work is… just…URGH. At the same time I get it. And with Section 230 up in the air im scared. Not only for content that is “adult” but for … the way we communicate.
Thats another day. Loneliness is exhausting. and every-time I think I get used to it, that Ive accepted it.. the fact of the matter is thats not true. Everyone is talking about LA going back into lockdown… and the truth is I have been in “lockdown” this whole time. I want to pretend that I don’t care about my page getting deleted but the truth is … I do. everytime I go on IG and see something im like… BRO THAT IS 10x more violating than mine. I get excited about the peices that I make and sad about the fact that I dont have anyone to share them with (not saying yall are no – one – tho I am pretty sure my two subscribers are bots bc they existed before I made this public?
WELP. I started that last night. I put my phone down while working with resin and came back to a tragic loss of someone from my pre-covid world. Not someone I was super close with (ie – I am “OK”) but hard nonetheless seeing it, seeing the way people react to it…
I Know that I’m supposed to be building this brand and like “making content” but i’ve never been one to hide what I am feeling and seeing everyone tweet “call your friends” is so triggering to me. (also idk where I was even heading with whatever I had up from last night)
Its been 8 months.
Call random people.
Actively reach out.
IDK if anyone reads this – but if you do / to my two (robot?) subs LOL
My DMS are open.
Ill start the convo. (this was the first “funny animal meme” I googled there is no meaning to it)